dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Success! We fucked roommates!
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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