Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
