It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
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