she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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