never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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