hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
