glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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