Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I want to be your penis for a week.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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