rhymes with "ouble enetration"
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
