Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
