It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize