Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
