Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize