Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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