My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
