And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
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