She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize