also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
