So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
