Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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