Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
