If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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