Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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