I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
