I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
