Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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