I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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