Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
