Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Let's get the cat blown out
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
