How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Randomize
