so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
