Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I just had sex on a roof
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
