Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
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