you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
