Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize
