I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize