some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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