i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
