In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
