Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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