Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
