I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
