I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
