She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize