Say something about gay babies.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
