So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
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