you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
