from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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