need another drink. this is the easiest way
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
