Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
